Work to Live... Or Live to Work?

On Wednesday I quit my job. I was having a really bad day (both life and my bi-polar mother had gotten to me), and apparently my manager (who I usually get along with) was having one too. I had to get there an hour and a half early due to terrible bus routes, and I arrived crying. We got in a big tiff because I said I didn't want to start early. She didn't take it kindly. So I quit.

It felt sort of like an "A&P" (by John Updike) moment. As I walked away, my heart was feeling really heavy... and I was worried. My manager called a few minutes later, saying that I was the one who NEEDED this job. That made me laugh- she needed me, and she was too haughty to admit it. Thats the entire reason we got into the argument. She knows I'm the only one there who ever does anything. But anyways, thats another thing that struck a chord like "A&P." He knew what he was doing was right, but received no recognition for it. The first day or so I tried to receive recognition that I was right... I didn't really get any. I keep telling myself that that job wasn't good for me. And I think I'm right. Every other aspect of my life is changing, so why not this part?

If you haven't read "A&P," I highly suggest reading it here. I have in depth notes, if you're interested.

And then another realization came to me. I've been feeling this helplessness, like I'm stuck, like I have no time... and its mostly because of work. I was either at school (my simple 2 classes), at work (which lasted forever), or sleeping (and dreaming about work). I knew I needed a new job, a job closer, a job less physically exerting and perhaps more mentally, a better pay and better hours... but I never had the time or energy to search. Now I have the time. I figure I'll use that as an excuse if a future employer asks me why I quit. And from now on, the "working to live" thing is going to be very important to me (or at least I hope I can keep it that way). Because most people just keep working... and working... and working... and they fail to see that they're not really working for anything, its just become their life. They don't know why. I can't have that happen to me. It'd be detrimental. There has to be some way.